Question:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> sit on the porch and smoke, like we did before we quit. It grounds you > to the now of the situation, nd stills everything for a moment, but > other things can do it too. I have my own suggestions if you would > like to hear them. > Sure, I would love to hear them. > I ended up not smoking, even went out shopping and resisted the urge to > buy a pack. In my head I was simply postponing the decision. They’re > always going to be available if I am desperate. But that’s the > question: am I desperate to smoke? I don’t think so… > A couple people asked me why not go back on Zyban. Well, there are a > bunch of reasons. The first is because the higher dosage didn’t really > work too well with me, and led me to prematurely quit taking it. The > lower dosage seemed to be beneficial in more ways than not thinking > about smoking; I was able to block other negative thoughts I’d been > having, thoughts which have since resurfaced. I like the idea of being > drug free– if I’m going to quit nicotine, why not quit everything, have > a naturally clear mind? I’m afraid of getting too comfortable on an > anti-depressant, never really getting to the root of the problem and > becoming dependent. Medications and psychologists were pushed on me > throughout my childhood, for all the wrong reasons, and I have a deep- > rooted resentment. I also don’t have anyone in my life right now that’s > supportive of any decisions I make. To the contrary, if I revealed that > I was once again taking an anti-depressant (given the bad experiences > I’ve had in the past), I’d have to endure an assault of criticism. So > it’d be something to keep a secret, and I hate secrets, I’m naturally an > honest person. That’s the gist of it. 
Regardless of all that, I’ve > decided to .. well, not decide.. by trying it and seeing what happens. > If I don’t want to take it, I can just stop at any time, there isn’t too > much to fear in terms of withdrawal. I only hope I’m doing the right > thing, because I already feel guilty about it.
I take a high dose but i’m on it for depression primarily (i’ve been taking it since before it was available in canada without special paperwork and a bottle with a sticker on it delievered to my shrink with give only to:ME in big letters.As stated elsewhere i haven’t always taken the full maount i’m supposed to and i’m trying to make sure i do…maybe it will help quit. I was forced on drugs a couple of times as a kid. It took a lot to force me to admit i needed medication as an adult and particularly that i had adhd (all family problems were blamed on my adhd). I had to come to the point of knowing my mother’s "history" of my life isn’t that accurate seeing as i haven’t lived there since i was 13, and even before they abused me for years and won’t admit it. She knows i take drugs..i believe she believes it prooves her right…i believe she’s said so (its been 5 years since we talked except briefly three years ago except for the very occaisional put my brother on the phone please…even then i usually got my dad). It came to the point when i had to say well they may have blamed the adhd but there are plenty of parents that raise adhd parents that raise kids without abusing them, and if my behaviour wasn’t the best, well i wasn’t an adult abusing a child (there is one year of therapy free to you…although it might take you a year of therapy to *believe* it…i knew it when i started, it took 11 months to believe it.) Take what you need to take, and give yourself some time to get used to quitting smoking…i don’t knw the figures for zyban but i know that it is customary to keep people who have had a depression on AD’s for about 6 months after they started or if it took a while to find right drug 6 months after they got better… Marcie > phase > Three weeks, five days, 13 hours, 59 minutes and 51 seconds. > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption
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Response:
Hi, Phase, Here’s what I am responding to in your last message: "I’m just … I don’t know… craving a moment of peace, how I used to go outside (never really smoked indoors) and take in the night, feel at ease with myself and the world. I know that had nothing to do with smoking, but doing it without the cigarettes is not something I’ve ever been able to do. It’s not the same." O.K., I’m going to tell you what I have found that helps, NOT is the same, but I feel that, for me, can be a familiar ritual with time. And a lot healthier. Now, keep in mind, this is just a suggestion. I don’t know how you look at being at ease, etc. while smoking, but one of my obsessions was watching the smoke, especially at night, and twisting the cig in my fingers for different effects. Also, smoke rings. Loved them. And NOW I have come to the conclusion that I can do the same exact thing with incense, NOT smoke, smells beautiful and has the same effect, only better because of the aroma therapy aspect of it. Nag Champa is my favorite, but I do love sandalwood, too. And you can whirl the stick, just like a cig, and make smoke rings too. No, it isn’t EXACTLY the same. But you know, I was bitching earlier in the week that I couldn’t have regular coffee anymore because of the caffeine, and some lovely person here said "How about something soothing like chamimilloe (sp?) and make a new ritual for yourself?". I thank whoever said that, I’ll have to go back and see who it was, because it works, it really does. I don’t know about humans in general but I know that if I do something at the same time for a wek or two, it’s a habit. And old habits, healthier habits can take the place. I also agree with Elle, in her message after that meditation is also really helpful. You don’t have to be a guru, or know a bunch of stuff, it just lets your mind unfold, that’s all. If you could, find a special place where you like to sit outside, get a stick or two of incense, take a little blanket and a drink and just watch the smoke and contemplate the sky. If you give it chance, I bet it would help. Just one more thing about the wanting to be natural and drug free, with out any anti-depressants…. getting to the root of it isn’t not taking meds. Depression is a condition that most of the time requires meds, however light, to make your brain work right, I’m sure you already know this if you have been thru years of it, I’m sorry, I’m not trying to talk down to you. It’s just thatif your depression is chemical, you can’t be med-free and be o.k. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Thank God for the meds! I also agree with Elle about not letting everyone know your business is not the same as lying or being dis-honest, not at all! I’m a fiercely independent and private person and I will tell somebody to f*** off quick if they start getting into my private business. I hope this helps a little bit, but just know that I do care about your emotional and physical well being and I think everyone here does. One more thought, yoga is great, too. But that’s just a thought. It works for me, not for everyone, I know. Lisa One week, two days, 1 hour, 47 minutes and 15 seconds. 181 cigarettes not smoked, saving $20.78. Life saved: 15 hours, 5 minutes. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> sit on the porch and smoke, like we did before we quit. It grounds you > to the now of the situation, nd stills everything for a moment, but > other things can do it too. I have my own suggestions if you would > like to hear them. > Sure, I would love to hear them. > I ended up not smoking, even went out shopping and resisted the urge to > buy a pack. In my head I was simply postponing the decision. They’re > always going to be available if I am desperate. But that’s the > question: am I desperate to smoke? I don’t think so… > A couple people asked me why not go back on Zyban. Well, there are a > bunch of reasons. The first is because the higher dosage didn’t really > work too well with me, and led me to prematurely quit taking it. The > lower dosage seemed to be beneficial in more ways than not thinking > about smoking; I was able to block other negative thoughts I’d been > having, thoughts which have since resurfaced. I like the idea of being > drug free– if I’m going to quit nicotine, why not quit everything, have > a naturally clear mind? I’m afraid of getting too comfortable on an > anti-depressant, never really getting to the root of the problem and > becoming dependent. Medications and psychologists were pushed on me > throughout my childhood, for all the wrong reasons, and I have a deep- > rooted resentment. I also don’t have anyone in my life right now that’s > supportive of any decisions I make. To the contrary, if I revealed that > I was once again taking an anti-depressant (given the bad experiences > I’ve had in the past), I’d have to endure an assault of criticism. So > it’d be something to keep a secret, and I hate secrets, I’m naturally an > honest person. That’s the gist of it. Regardless of all that, I’ve > decided to .. well, not decide.. by trying it and seeing what happens. > If I don’t want to take it, I can just stop at any time, there isn’t too > much to fear in terms of withdrawal. I only hope I’m doing the right > thing, because I already feel guilty about it. > phase > Three weeks, five days, 13 hours, 59 minutes and 51 seconds. > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> The > lower dosage seemed to be beneficial in more ways than not thinking > about smoking; I was able to block other negative thoughts I’d been > having, thoughts which have since resurfaced. I like the idea of being > drug free– if I’m going to quit nicotine, why not quit everything, have > a naturally clear mind? > Can you see how this thought possibly sabotages you? > Zyban/wellbutrin is a *medication* that is prescribed for smoking cessation > because it is effective in helping people in your situation. You don’t have > to stay on it forever, but how long is a month or three of Zyban treatment > compared to the years you’ve been poisoning yourself with smokes? > Phase, my dear, you don’t have to fix everything all at once, and for many > it’s a big mistake to try to get well too fast. You really *can* give > yourself permission to take this a step at a time. That’s what I had to do. > You don’t have to overthink it beyond where you are right now, today. Today > you’re a guy who’s about to give up his quit. Don’t you think that’s where > your focus belongs right now? On staying quit today, no matter what tools > you may need to use to do it?
She knows of what she speaks, Phase. What she says in this last paragraph is so true. TODAY is all that matters if you really want to stay quit. No matter how you choose to do it, you’ll find a way that works for YOU. Best wishes… Sally Quit for 11 months with the help of the patch, Welbutrin, and AS3…not necessarily in that order… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’m afraid of getting too comfortable on an > anti-depressant, never really getting to the root of the problem and > becoming dependent. Medications and psychologists were pushed on me > throughout my childhood, for all the wrong reasons, and I have a deep- > rooted resentment. > And today also a challenge to work through it, if you want to– or not– > that is entirely up to you. You don’t have to go the Zyban route, but you > don’t have to let a decision that it isn’t for you sabotage your efforts to > quit, either. You can use different tools, if you want. There are lots of > tools available to you. The CBT stuff will help– keep working on that– > learn meditation if you want– practice reframing your thoughts to get rid > of that mindset of deprivation you’re nursing… all sorts of effective > tools are available if you want to use them. > I also don’t have anyone in my life right now that’s > supportive of any decisions I make. > This is not true; you have us. We’ll support you no matter what decision > you make. Promise. > To the contrary, if I revealed that > I was once again taking an anti-depressant (given the bad experiences > I’ve had in the past), I’d have to endure an assault of criticism. > Huh? From who? Whoever this is, they have no right to stand between you > and effective treatment for any problem, whether it be depression or smoking > cessation or both. Tell these people to fuck off, and do what you need to > do to take care of yourself. You don’t need approval from anyone else to > take care of yourself. > So > it’d be something to keep a secret, and I hate secrets, I’m naturally an > honest person. > Then don’t keep it a secret, though my honest response to this is to want to > suggest to you that some things are simply none of other peoples’ business. > It’s okay to not tell everyone everything. Are these people grilling you on > every detail of your life? If so, do they really have a right to do that? > Why is it a secret to erect healthy boundaries about what you are and are > not willing to share with them– especially if their tendency is to tear > down your efforts toward self-improvement? > That’s the gist of it. Regardless of all that, I’ve > decided to .. well, not decide.. by trying it and seeing what happens. > If I don’t want to take it, I can just stop at any time, there isn’t too > much to fear in terms of withdrawal. I only hope I’m doing the right > thing, because I already feel guilty about it. > Lose the guilt and do what you need to do. This may be the most important > thing you will ever do for yourself; you owe it to yourself to throw > everything you can at this addiction. > Hugs, > elle
Response:
I tell myself "I could smoke" on a regular basis. I have an emotional disorder, and sometimes things get out of control, and I know that if I smoked things would be a bit less out of control. But I haven’t done it in two years, because… I don’t exactly know why I don’t, but I am comitted to making smoking my very *last* option, and I haven’t gotten to that point yet. If I did smoke, it sure as hell wouldn’t be nicotine free cigs. I don’t get the point of them. They aren’t a "loophole" product. They contain a lot of the stuff that cigarettes do, as well as, at least in some cases, a low level of nicotine. It’s not like "alcohol free" wine. I would still be breathing in smoke every day, I just wouldn’t get the benefits of the nicotine. Heck, I’d rather have something that delivered nicotine without cigs than cigs that didn’t deliver nicotine. It sounds as if you are on the right track with the cognitive thinking. It is really a valuable took for reducing negative thinking. But it takes time for it to become automatic. You’ve only been quit a few weeks. You *will* learn to deal with negative things without smoking in time. It just takes practice – learning new habits. Give it some time. You don’t sound as if you are desperate for a smoke – just frustrated with how hard it is. But it will get easier. You will learn to deal with things. BTW, I’m going to put in a plug for a favorite book. "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook". It has two chapters dedicated to mind management with exercises to help with negative thoughts. I’ve been applying them for a bit now, and I’m already seeing progress. It’s widely available – I got mine at Barnes and Noble – and not expensive. Very worthwhile. Diane M.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. > So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I > know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me > feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which > makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me > anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and > whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing > with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only > positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a > moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: > I could smoke, yeah. But what then? > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts. > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. 
> phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption
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Response:
> The > lower dosage seemed to be beneficial in more ways than not thinking > about smoking; I was able to block other negative thoughts I’d been > having, thoughts which have since resurfaced. I like the idea of being > drug free– if I’m going to quit nicotine, why not quit everything, have > a naturally clear mind?
Can you see how this thought possibly sabotages you? Zyban/wellbutrin is a *medication* that is prescribed for smoking cessation because it is effective in helping people in your situation. You don’t have to stay on it forever, but how long is a month or three of Zyban treatment compared to the years you’ve been poisoning yourself with smokes? Phase, my dear, you don’t have to fix everything all at once, and for many it’s a big mistake to try to get well too fast. You really *can* give yourself permission to take this a step at a time. That’s what I had to do. You don’t have to overthink it beyond where you are right now, today. Today you’re a guy who’s about to give up his quit. Don’t you think that’s where your focus belongs right now? On staying quit today, no matter what tools you may need to use to do it? > I’m afraid of getting too comfortable on an > anti-depressant, never really getting to the root of the problem and > becoming dependent. Medications and psychologists were pushed on me > throughout my childhood, for all the wrong reasons, and I have a deep- > rooted resentment.
And today also a challenge to work through it, if you want to– or not– that is entirely up to you. You don’t have to go the Zyban route, but you don’t have to let a decision that it isn’t for you sabotage your efforts to quit, either. You can use different tools, if you want. There are lots of tools available to you. The CBT stuff will help– keep working on that– learn meditation if you want– practice reframing your thoughts to get rid of that mindset of deprivation you’re nursing… all sorts of effective tools are available if you want to use them. > I also don’t have anyone in my life right now that’s > supportive of any decisions I make.
This is not true; you have us. We’ll support you no matter what decision you make. Promise. To the contrary, if I revealed that > I was once again taking an anti-depressant (given the bad experiences > I’ve had in the past), I’d have to endure an assault of criticism.
Huh? From who? Whoever this is, they have no right to stand between you and effective treatment for any problem, whether it be depression or smoking cessation or both. Tell these people to fuck off, and do what you need to do to take care of yourself. You don’t need approval from anyone else to take care of yourself. > So > it’d be something to keep a secret, and I hate secrets, I’m naturally an > honest person.
Then don’t keep it a secret, though my honest response to this is to want to suggest to you that some things are simply none of other peoples’ business. It’s okay to not tell everyone everything. Are these people grilling you on every detail of your life? If so, do they really have a right to do that? Why is it a secret to erect healthy boundaries about what you are and are not willing to share with them– especially if their tendency is to tear down your efforts toward self-improvement? That’s the gist of it. Regardless of all that, I’ve > decided to .. well, not decide.. by trying it and seeing what happens. > If I don’t want to take it, I can just stop at any time, there isn’t too > much to fear in terms of withdrawal. I only hope I’m doing the right > thing, because I already feel guilty about it.
Lose the guilt and do what you need to do. This may be the most important thing you will ever do for yourself; you owe it to yourself to throw everything you can at this addiction. Hugs, elle
Response:
> sit on the porch and smoke, like we did before we quit. It grounds you > to the now of the situation, nd stills everything for a moment, but > other things can do it too. I have my own suggestions if you would > like to hear them.
Sure, I would love to hear them. I ended up not smoking, even went out shopping and resisted the urge to buy a pack. In my head I was simply postponing the decision. They’re always going to be available if I am desperate. But that’s the question: am I desperate to smoke? I don’t think so… A couple people asked me why not go back on Zyban. Well, there are a bunch of reasons. The first is because the higher dosage didn’t really work too well with me, and led me to prematurely quit taking it. The lower dosage seemed to be beneficial in more ways than not thinking about smoking; I was able to block other negative thoughts I’d been having, thoughts which have since resurfaced. I like the idea of being drug free– if I’m going to quit nicotine, why not quit everything, have a naturally clear mind? I’m afraid of getting too comfortable on an anti-depressant, never really getting to the root of the problem and becoming dependent. Medications and psychologists were pushed on me throughout my childhood, for all the wrong reasons, and I have a deep- rooted resentment. I also don’t have anyone in my life right now that’s supportive of any decisions I make. To the contrary, if I revealed that I was once again taking an anti-depressant (given the bad experiences I’ve had in the past), I’d have to endure an assault of criticism. So it’d be something to keep a secret, and I hate secrets, I’m naturally an honest person. That’s the gist of it. Regardless of all that, I’ve decided to .. well, not decide.. by trying it and seeing what happens. If I don’t want to take it, I can just stop at any time, there isn’t too much to fear in terms of withdrawal. I only hope I’m doing the right thing, because I already feel guilty about it. phase Three weeks, five days, 13 hours, 59 minutes and 51 seconds. —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
Response:
Hi, Phase, I have just been quit this time for a little over a week, but I quit with this group a three years ago and stayed quit for over a year. The difference is no NRT’s this time. But what I wanted to say is that I screwed up my quit last time because I just wanted to smoke, just once, I had just gone back to college and I just wanted to do it, once. But I couldn’t do it once because it took three to get comfortable with them stinging my throat and burning my eyes, and then I siad the hell with it and now here I am. Ultimately, the choice is yours, and I can’t say one word about it. I do tell myself that I can smoke, it IS a mind thing, and to me personally, it’s just a comfort for me to say to myself, You can choose to smoke anytime you want, you’re an adult and no one can take that choice away from you". I guess it’s just knowing that I COULD if I wanted to helps, it makes me feel like they are not gone forever, does that make any sense at all? I think I kinda know a little of what you are feeling about the war, I was watching it Friday and I said to my daughter how terrified the people must be, the children, and then the next day they showed the little camel around the oil well fires…it broke my heart. I don’t want to debate either, but know someone else shares your views for a little while, and yes, when things get so bad, it would be nice to go sit on the porch and smoke, like we did before we quit. It grounds you to the now of the situation, nd stills everything for a moment, but other things can do it too. I have my own suggestions if you would like to hear them. Anyway, let me quit dribbling on, it’s Sunday morning and I have too much time on my hands, sorry for the speech! I hope you feel better soon, whatever you decide. Lisa One week, one day, 17 hours, 46 minutes and 56 seconds. 174 cigarettes not smoked, saving $20.02. Life saved: 14 hours, 30 minutes. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. > So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I > know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me > feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which > makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me > anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and > whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing > with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only > positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a > moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: > I could smoke, yeah. But what then? > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts. > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
Response:
Don’t be stoopid…don’t talk yourself into busting your quit. FMD is definitely something to be proud of….wtg! Sally
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. > So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I > know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me > feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which > makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me > anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and > whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing > with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only > positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a > moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: > I could smoke, yeah. But what then? > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts. > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption
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Response:
>Thanks for all the responses. I still don’t know what I’m going to do, >but you’ve allowed me to put things in better perspective.
Hmm….from personal experience… don’t waste your money, your quit, or your health. They put the idea of smoking back in my head, and it took around a week (at least) to stop thinking of buying another pack. What IS wrong with getting back on zyban/wellbutrin? Allie
Response:
Yeah, what Ozmee said. Every word. Great post, Ozmee! hugs, elle — "The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears this is true." -James Branch Cabell
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I think that is a normal feeling friend. True, you can load up and > smoke yourself to death today. So what, you can smoke anytime you > want right? But the reason you are not smoking is because you decided > to stop smoking. It isn’t any big deal to stick a cigarette or > whatever in your mouth, the big deal is not to do it. My opinion is > that you need to give yourself ‘permission’ to not smoke, permission > to decide not to smoke and permission to tell your nicodemon to go > jump in the lake when it tries to convince you that you are denying > yourself by not smoking. > Remember, the smoke causes cyanide, would you pop a cyanide pill into > your mouth on purpose??? Smoking helps encourage emphysema. I have > read you can get emphysema as you age anyway, but perhaps smoking for > 40-50 years means the difference between being tethered to an oxygen > tank or NOT tethered. > It’s OK not to smoke. > The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I > used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m > working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. > So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I > know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make > me > feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, > which > makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me > anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and > whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am > dealing > with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only > positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a > moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: > I could smoke, yeah. But what then? > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts. > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet > News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via > Encryption =—
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>So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I >know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me >feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which >makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me >anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and >whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing >with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only >positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a >moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question:
Phase, Smoking made all off my problems go away. If I had a problem at work I’d get up and go outside and take a smoke break. If smoking bugged me at home I’d go outside and have a smoke. No more problem to worry about. I was in my own world. It was my self appointed time-out/coffee break/. Because I smoked I could just step aside. Why? Because I smoked and had my own permission. I hate to sound like the poster board on quiting but quiting IS a process. We learn that we can lay in bed on a spring day w/o having to run downstairs to light up. We learn that the movie "The Titanic" is 3hrs. and 20 frickin minutes long and I don’t care because I don’t smoke. We learn that that yellow crap on the plastic walls in the smoking cell of you local airport sticks, stinks and is SICK. Quiting is a new lesson that we are teaching ourselfs. The pain and the pure YUCKY fealings are real. The changes in the way we live our lives is real. But it does get better the further away you get from it. Time in is time out. Good luck. Craig Watts OF
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> just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts.
Whats wrong with going on the zyban again…i haven’t had a chance to read too many posts here but i’ve already come across someone who stopped the patch at a month (i expect if they are here they are probably a regular smoker, the only one’s in canada that make it through the program in less than 6 weeks if they follow the whole thing are those that smoke less than 14 cigarettes a day) and no you stopped your zyban in less than a month. Zyban is cheap…whats wrong with a little help? Even with cheap american cigarettes. Its about $50 for a month here on slow release i believe….and i take a very high dose (as Wellbutrin for depression, i’ve been taking it before it could be rx’d in Canada based on compasionate grounds ie i’d taken everything else, they thought mixing it and another anti-depressant (AD) might work…and it did better than before although we only found a really good combo about 7 years later Marcie I am one of those people with depression that just has to take some of the pills for life, and go off a few when/if i am planning to get pregnant. This is not that common and comes partially from the fact that i’m bipolar 2 (instead of bipolar 1 with long stretches or just Major affective disorder with stretches of normal) which tend to be depressed most of the time unless we go a little high…no normal period unless on the way up or down usually. I doubt it has anything to do with taking zyban for quitting smoking although i am far from an expert on that topic YMMV marcie – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption
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Hi, Thanks for all the responses. I still don’t know what I’m going to do, but you’ve allowed me to put things in better perspective. I don’t think my intention was to buy nic-free cigarettes and smoke them regularly. Just tonight. I’m subconsciously always looking for excuses, like for instance I’m moving a week from today, so I can tell myself "This can be the last time I smoke before living in my new apartment. Then I’ll start with a clean slate there." Except I know that I had similar thoughts when I moved here from my last place, and when I moved there, etc. I’m just … I don’t know… craving a moment of peace, how I used to go outside (never really smoked indoors) and take in the night, feel at ease with myself and the world. I know that had nothing to do with smoking, but doing it without the cigarettes is not something I’ve ever been able to do. It’s not the same. There’s so much going on in the world right now that is tearing at my heart, well beyond anything that’s directly happened in my life. I don’t want to get into debate with anyone with whether or not war is justified, but to me, I’ve searched my soul and can’t find any reason to take the life of another, especially in this case, and I can’t imagine the terror of those people, having to wait until the next bomb falls, seeing their city in flames. Again I don’t want to get into any argument about this, I don’t feel like it’s worth it, I have no intention of changing anyone’s mind. But it’s like, right now, there is no thought I can turn to without feeling dismay. And there’s nothing I can really do about it… So, I mean, that’s kind of why I wish I could go out and have a cigarette, it’s stupid, but it’s how I used to disconnect. And it’d probably work. Until the next time, and so on… Yeah, I know. phase —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
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I think that is a normal feeling friend. True, you can load up and smoke yourself to death today. So what, you can smoke anytime you want right? But the reason you are not smoking is because you decided to stop smoking. It isn’t any big deal to stick a cigarette or whatever in your mouth, the big deal is not to do it. My opinion is that you need to give yourself ‘permission’ to not smoke, permission to decide not to smoke and permission to tell your nicodemon to go jump in the lake when it tries to convince you that you are denying yourself by not smoking. Remember, the smoke causes cyanide, would you pop a cyanide pill into your mouth on purpose??? Smoking helps encourage emphysema. I have read you can get emphysema as you age anyway, but perhaps smoking for 40-50 years means the difference between being tethered to an oxygen tank or NOT tethered. It’s OK not to smoke.
The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used to or whatever. Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: I could smoke, yeah. But what then? Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my stupid damaging thoughts. I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. phase Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! but I haven’t cheated thus far) —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups
—= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
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> I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get.
like John Dow said a few days ago: "God, we’d try anything, won’t we!" … and that INCLUDES getting pissed off at ourselves … and I agree with my fellow angel Kita give yourself a break, dearest Phase! > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far)
we forgive you now go to sleep May the road rise to meet you Gita
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If you’re looking for my opinion it’s that you need some more time to make this decision. It’s too soon to decide right now if you should smoke again. At this time in your quit you are on the edge of it getting much better for you. Problems seldom go away overnight. Whether you smoke or not. I don’t give a hoot one way or the other about your meter. I’m pulling for you. Kim 10M
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. > So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I > know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me > feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which > makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me > anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and > whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing > with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only > positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a > moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: > I could smoke, yeah. But what then? > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts. > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far) > —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- > http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups > —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption
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> The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: > Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used > to or whatever. > Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working > on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative > thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises > and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress.
Did you think quitting would fix them? Give yourself a break. > And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product,
As you go out and buy the product, therefore supporting "them"? > I could smoke, yeah. But what then?
Things would be just like it is now. Except you’d feel worse for letting yourself down. And you’d smell and be coughing. And you might be stuck in the mousetrap again. > Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s > been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to > just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my > stupid damaging thoughts.
Why not?(Go back on Zyban?) Or something similiar? > I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just > go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can > anticipate the responses I’m gonna get.
The three threes. One of those is 3 weeks. Maybe it’s coming a few days late for you. Mine came on day 20 I think. I imagine it’s like when the honeymoon wears off and someone realizes they said "til death do us part" to that person that can’t pick up their socks. Phase, it’s just a phase. You won’t feel like this forever. At least give it a few days to change. Don’t make any decisions now. Go to sleep, even if it’s 4 in the afternoon. Don’t do something you’ll regret on a moment’s notice. > phase > Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. > (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! > but I haven’t cheated thus far)
I don’t care what people do with their own meters. But I think the way you are rationalizing or warning about the above, is just junkie thinking. You are just quit when it’s convenient for you? Bah. Don’t smoke. Give your quit 24 hours, sleep on it. You wanted this quit, at least give it a chance. GL kita
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The question I am asking myself, I will pass along to you: Smoking is how I pretend to deal with emotional problems. Or how I used to or whatever. Since I quit, none of those problems have really gone away. I’m working on it, I am; I’m trying to learn about CBT and how to conquer negative thoughts, i.e. cognitive distortions. Despite doing written exercises and stuff, I haven’t made all that much progress. So I say to myself, I could smoke. Those nicotine-free cigarettes. I know, it won’t do anything to solve my problems. It won’t even make me feel better. And fuck them for making such a ‘loophole’ product, which makes me feel less guilty about trying them out (and don’t give me anything about how I’m still taking in all the chemicals and tar and whatnot, I know that– my chronic cough is still something I am dealing with, and I know that smoking will exacerbate it). I think the only positive benefit would be that I could revel in some nostalgia for a moment. Anyhow, it all comes down to a question: I could smoke, yeah. But what then? Or I could not… except, the question’s the same: What then? It’s been a month, and I’m struggling. And I hate it. I am so tempted to just go back on Zyban, say to hell with smoking and to hell with my stupid damaging thoughts. I’m kind of pissed off at myself. I’ve almost made up my mind to just go and smoke a few. I thought I’d run it by you, even though I can anticipate the responses I’m gonna get. phase Three weeks, four days, 20 hours, 20 minutes and 26 seconds. (If I did smoke tonight, I wouldn’t reset my meter. Just so you know! but I haven’t cheated thus far) —-== Posted via Newsfeed.Com – Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==—- http://www.newsfeed.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! >100,000 Newsgroups —= 19 East/West-Coast Specialized Servers – Total Privacy via Encryption =—
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, but decided to buy a leather jacket for the winter instead lol. Anyone else sailing on this trip by any chance? Have to go hit the various cruise boards and make some new friends in advance. Anyhow, happy to be on the high seas again in just a month (perpetual late booker that I am….) Will get to go to my first private island (weather permitting of course) so that should be interesting. Caused a bit of a stir on the Cruise Critic boards asking if there was a nude bathing area on Half Moon Cay…..ooops! HAL, watch out, here I come! Jeff 
Howie